A Cattleman's Honor Read online

  “What things?” she asked breathlessly.

  “What I promised I would, when you were seventeen.” His mouth brushed her lips as gently as a breath, lingering, tasting, arousing. “Don’t you remember, Natalie? I said that, when the time came, I was going to teach you how to make love.”

  Chapter Ten

  Natalie couldn’t believe she’d actually heard him say that, and in a tone so tender that she hardly recognized it. It was difficult to think, anyway, with his hard mouth making little tingles of excitement everywhere it touched her face.

  “Do you think I’m joking?” he asked when she didn’t answer him. He bent, his breath whispering against her parted lips. “All the teasing stopped when Dr. Hayes called me and said you were at the point of death,” he added tautly. His head lifted, and he looked into her eyes. “From now on, it’s totally serious.”

  She didn’t understand. Her expression told him so.

  He brushed his mouth softly over her lips, careful not to take advantage of the situation or cause her even more pain. “I should never have let you leave Medicine Ridge in the first place,” he said gruffly.

  “You told me I wasn’t welcome at the ranch ever again,” she admonished, her lower lip trembling.

  He actually groaned. He kissed her with something that felt like utter desperation and visibly had to force himself to stop. His hand was faintly unsteady as it pushed back her disheveled hair and traced her oval face. “I thought you went from me to him,” he confessed huskily. “I couldn’t bear the thought.”

  Her expression lightened. Her heart seemed to lift. For the first time, she reached to touch his hard mouth. “As if I could,” she said with wistful sadness.

  He brought her palm to his lips and kissed it hungrily. “Weeks of misery,” he said heavily, “all because Vivian and I jumped to conclusions.”

  “It’s hard to trust people. I ought to know.” She searched his one beautiful eye slowly. She was uncertain with him, hesitant. The medicine was still affecting her, and she was wary of his sudden affection. She didn’t trust it. Worse, she was remembering her past. There had never been a person she loved that she didn’t lose. First her parents and then Carl; even if Carl hadn’t been in love with her, he’d been her first real taste of it.

  “Such a somber expression,” he said gently. “What are you thinking?”

  “That I’ve lost everybody I ever loved,” she whispered involuntarily, shivering.

  His head lifted and he looked straight into her wide, worried eyes. “You won’t lose me,” he said quietly.

  Her heart ran wild. Now she was certain that she was hearing things. She opened her mouth to ask him to say it again, but just as she did, the nurse came in to check her vitals. Mack only smiled at her frustration and went in the hall to stretch his legs.

  When he came back, it was as if he hadn’t said anything outrageous at all. He started outlining travel plans, and by the time he finished, Vivian and the boys were back and conversation remained general.

  * * *

  Natalie’s lungs were clear by Friday morning, and the surgeon, Dr. Hayes, released her for travel home in the Learjet. Mack lifted her out of the wheelchair at the hospital entrance and into the hired car, which they took to the airport. Less than an hour later, they were airborne, and by late afternoon, they were landing in Medicine Ridge.

  The foreman had driven the Lincoln to the airport and had another ranch hand follow him in one of the ranch trucks. That made enough room for the Learjet’s weary passengers to ride in the car to the ranch house. There, Mack picked Natalie up in his arms and, holding her just a little too close, he mounted the front steps and carried her over the threshold.

  He glanced at her with a faintly possessive smile as he stopped just briefly in the vestibule to search her soft eyes.

  “You don’t have to carry me,” she whispered, aware that the boys had headed straight for the kitchen and Vivian had gone ahead of them upstairs to open the guest room door for them.

  “Why not?” he mused, bending to brush her mouth lazily with his. “It’s good practice.”

  Practice for what, she wondered wearily, but she didn’t question the odd remark. She moved her arm and grimaced as her whole side protested. The wound was still painful.

  “Sorry,” he said gently. “I keep forgetting the condition you’re in. We’ll go right on up.”

  He carried her easily up the long, graceful staircase to the guest room that adjoined his bedroom. She gave him a worried look.

  “I’m not having you at the other end of the house in this condition,” he told her as he passed Vivian and went into the airy room with its canopied double bed, where he gently put her down. “I’m going to leave the connecting door open, as well. If you need me in the night, all you have to do is call me. I’m a light sleeper.” He glanced at his sister with a speaking glance. “Something I can’t say for anybody else in this family.”

  Vivian grimaced. “I do eventually wake up,” she said defensively.

  “I’ve got your pain medication in my pocket,” he added. “If you need it at bedtime, I’ll make sure you get it. Vivian can help you into a gown.”

  “Something nice and modest,” Vivian murmured, tongue in cheek, with a wicked glance at her brother.

  “Good idea,” he said imperturbably. He paused at the door and that good eye twinkled. “And I’ll wear pajamas for a change.”

  Vivian chuckled at Natalie’s flushed cheeks as Mack left them alone. “You’re in no condition for any hanky-panky,” she reminded her friend. “So stop worrying and just concentrate on getting well. You’ll never convince me that you won’t feel safer with Mack a few yards away in the night.”

  “I will,” Natalie had to admit. “But I still feel like I’m imposing.”

  “Family doesn’t impose,” her friend shot right back. “Now let’s get you into something light and comfortable, and then I’ll go and see what’s on the menu for supper. I don’t know about you, but I’m starved!”

  * * *

  It came as a surprise when Mack brought a tray to her room and sat down to have his supper with her. But other surprises followed. Instead of going to work in the study, as was his habit, he read her a selection of first-person accounts of life in Montana before the turn of the century. History was her favorite subject, and she loved it. She closed her eyes and listened to his deep voice until she fell asleep.

  She’d been heavily sedated in the hospital and she hadn’t had nightmares. But her first night in a comfortable bed, she relived the stabbing. She was lifted close to a warm, comforting chest and held very gently while soothing endearments were whispered into her ear. At first it felt like a dream. But the heat and muscle of the chest felt very real, like the thick hair that covered it. Her hand moved experimentally in the darkness.

  “Mack?” she whispered hesitantly.

  “I hope you don’t expect to wake up and find any other man in your bed from now on,” he murmured sleepily. His big hand smoothed her hair gently. “You had a nightmare, sweetheart. Just a nightmare. Try to go back to sleep.”

  She blinked and lifted her face just enough to look around. It was her bedroom, but Mack was under the covers with her and had apparently been there for some time.

  He pulled her down and held her as close as he dared. “Did you really think I meant to leave you alone in here after what you’ve been through?” he asked somberly.

  “But what will the family think?” she asked worriedly.

  “That I love you, probably.”

  She was so drowsy that she couldn’t make sense of the words. “Oh.”

  “Which is why we’re getting married, as soon as you’re back on your feet.”

  She wondered if painkillers could make people hallucinate. “Now I know I’m still asleep,” she murmured to herself.

  “No such luck. Try to
sleep before I do something stupid. And for the record, my sister’s idea of a modest nightgown is sick. Really sick. I can feel your skin through that damned thing!”

  He probably could. She could certainly feel his chest against her breasts much better than she was comfortable doing. But she still wasn’t quite awake. Her fingers curved into the thicket of hair that covered his breastbone. “What sort of stupid thing were you thinking of trying?” she asked conversationally.

  “This.” His hand found the tiny buttons that held the bodice together and efficiently slipped them so that she was lying skin to skin against his chest.

  She felt her nipples go hard at once, and she gasped with the heated rush of sensation that made her heart race.

  “That’s exactly how I feel,” he murmured dryly, “a few inches lower.”

  It took her a few seconds to realize what he was saying, and she was glad that the darkness hid her face. “You pig!” she exclaimed.

  He chuckled. “I can’t resist it. You do rise to the bait like a trophy fish,” he commented. “You’ll get used to it. I’ve been blinder than I look, but a lot of things became clear when that surgeon phoned me. The main one was that you belong to me. I’m not a perfect physical specimen, and I’ve cornered the market on dependents, but you could do worse.”

  “There’s nothing wrong with you,” she said quietly. “You have a slight disability.”

  “We both know I could go blind eventually, Natalie,” he said, speaking to her as he never had before. “But I think we could cope with that, if we had to.”

  “Of course we could,” she replied.

  His hand smoothed her hair. “The boys and Vivian love you, and you love them. We may have disagreements, but we’ll be a family, just the same. A big family, if we all have children,” he added, chuckling. “But children will be a bonus.”

  Her hand flattened on his chest. “I’d like to have a child with you,” she said daringly. She felt his heart jump when she said it. “Would you like a son or a daughter?” she added.

  “I’d like anything we get,” he said quietly. “And so would you.”

  That sounded permanent. She smiled and couldn’t stop smiling. Children meant a commitment.

  “Yes. So would I,” she said, closing her eyes with a long, heartfelt sigh of contentment.

  His hand tensed on her hair. “I wouldn’t do too much of that,” he cautioned.

  “What?”

  “I can feel every cell of your body from the waist up, Nat,” he said in a strained tone. “And I’ve gone hungry for a while. You aren’t up to a passionate night. Not yet.”

  “That last bit sounds promising,” she murmured.

  “I’ll make you a promise,” he replied. “When you’re in a condition to appreciate it, I’ll make you glad you waited for me.”

  “I already am, Mack,” she whispered. “I love you more than the air I breathe.”

  For a few seconds, he didn’t say anything. Then he turned, and his mouth found hers in the darkness in a kiss that was hard and hungry and passionate but so tender that it touched her heart. But after a few seconds, when one of his legs slid against hers almost involuntarily, he stiffened and abruptly rolled over onto his back beside her, groaning as he laughed.

  “I knew this was a bad idea,” he sighed.

  Her body was tingling with delicious sensations. She pulled herself into a sitting position, grimacing with discomfort. “Well, there goes that brilliant idea,” she murmured, holding her rib cage as she eased back down.

  “What brilliant idea?” he asked.

  “I was going to see if I could—” She stopped dead when she realized what she was about to say. “I mean, I...”

  There was a highly amused sound from beside her. “If you got on top, Nat, I’d still have to hold you there, and after the first few seconds, I wouldn’t be gentle. We’d reopen that wound and the pain would be vicious.”

  She swallowed. “Just a thought. Forget I mentioned it.”

  He laughed tenderly, bending to kiss her briefly. “I’ll try,” he said softly. “Thanks for the thought, anyway. But this isn’t the time or the place. First we get married,” he continued. “And then we can make all sorts of discoveries about each other.”

  Her heart was still racing. “It’s exciting to think about that.”

  “For both of us,” he admitted. “But we’d better quit right now, while we’re ahead.” He bent and brushed his mouth softly over a hard nipple, lingering to taste it with his tongue.

  She caught her breath and he lifted his head to look at her in the soft glow of the small night-light.

  “I like that,” she whispered.

  “Me, too.” He was hesitating. This was a bad idea. One of the worst he’d ever had. But he was bending to her body while he was thinking it. His mouth covered her breast again, very gently, and one lean hand smoothed down her body to ease her gown up. He traced her upper thigh with slow, expert movements, making lazy and exciting forays inside it under the gown.

  She started trembling. Her hands hesitated on his shoulders while she let her mind go blank except for the pleasure he was giving her. It had been so long. While she was thinking it, she said it.

  “So long,” he breathed urgently. “Yes, Nat. Too long!”

  Her hands went between them to his broad chest and caressed him with delight, enjoying the thickness of hair and the warm muscles under it.

  She felt his body tense and his hand move to a much more intimate exploration. She tried to catch his wrist, but it was too sweet to deny. She gave in, moaning as she felt the most exquisite sensations pulse through her.

  She was drowning in pleasure. It was so intense that she barely felt him take her hand and guide it down his body. He’d unsnapped his pajamas and she was inside them, discovering the major difference between men and women with a fascination that was going to make her die of embarrassment sooner or later. For the moment, though, it was exciting to touch him that way. She couldn’t have dreamed of doing that with anyone else.

  He shifted restlessly, enticing her slow tracing to grow in confidence as he groaned aloud at her breast.

  “It won’t hurt you, will it?” she whispered shakily.

  “What you’re doing?” He shivered and his mouth grew hungry at her breast, making her moan, as well. “I’m in agony. No, don’t stop!” he said quickly, catching her hand before it withdrew. “Don’t stop, baby,” he whispered, moving to cover her mouth with his. “I love feeling you touch me! I love it!”

  She opened her lips to speak, and he invaded them as his hand moved into a more intimate exploration, one that caused her whole body to spin off into a realm she’d never known existed.

  She was moving in a helpless rhythm, helping him, enticing him to continue. Her eyes opened and his was there, seeing her pleasure, watching.

  “This is how it feels when a man and a woman go all the way,” he whispered huskily, and before she could question the blunt statement, his touch became urgent and invasive, and she seemed to explode into a thousand pulsating, white-hot fragments under his fascinated scrutiny.

  She clutched his shoulders, shivering in the aftermath, her open mouth against his bare shoulder. Seconds later, she was crying. Her chest hurt again, but her whole body felt as if it had been caressed to heaven.

  “Mack,” she whimpered. “Oh, Mack!”

  He was kissing her, soft, undemanding caresses all over her face and throat, down to her still taut breasts and back up again. She could feel his body against her without a stitch of clothing in the way. And only then did she realize that her gown was lying on the floor somewhere.

  She didn’t remember the clothes being removed. She only remembered the throbbing pleasure that even in memory made her tremble.

  “When we have each other, we’re going to set fires,” he whispered into her ear.
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br />   “I want to,” she breathed into his lips. Her hands smoothed his cheeks as she looked at him with caressing eyes. “I want to right now.” Her hips moved against his, feeling the hard thrust of him that he made no effort to hide.

  “So do I. More than you realize,” he replied tersely. “But we’re not going one step further than this until you’re completely healed and we’re married.”

  “Mack!” she groaned.

  “You can’t take my weight,” he said. “Even if you lie over me, it would be more violent than this when I went into you. And once I started, I’d lose control.”

  Her gasp was audible. Word pictures formed in her mind and made her flush in the dim light.

  “You’re still a virgin,” he continued huskily. “No matter how much I arouse you, it’s probably going to be uncomfortable. But I want you to know what it’s going to feel like when you adjust to me. I don’t want you afraid of me on our wedding night.”

  “As if I could be...after that,” she whispered, pushing her face into his throat. “Oh, it was...glorious!”

  “Watching you was glorious,” he said roughly. “But we have to stop. I won’t take my pleasure at the expense of your pain.”

  He got up abruptly, pausing to help her into her gown before he picked up his pajama trousers. He turned toward her deliberately, watching her avert her eyes.

  “Are you afraid to look at me?” he asked gently.

  She grimaced. “I’m sorry. It’s...difficult.”

  He laughed, but it wasn’t mocking laughter. “All right, chicken.” She heard his pajama trousers snap, unusually loud in the room, before he climbed into bed beside her and drew her demurely to his side.

  “You’re going to stay with me all night?” she whispered breathlessly.

  “All night, every night, if I have to put a chastity belt on you to protect you until we’re married,” he said wickedly. “And I may. I want you excessively.”